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Friday, December 31st, 2004
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December 31st 2004|4.18pm - An Introduction
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Group J writes:
We, the members of Group J, chose to write about Rizal, his activities etc. in the years of 1861 to 1882(?). This journal is structured in such a way that Rizal writes in the journal proper, and any reactions to his words/his actions will be supplied by the group in the comments section.
After the confusion, group J has now, finally, spoken, and agreed on the topic of Rizal. From Luna, to Aguinaldo, and ultimately Rizal.
--Group J
*please forgive the weird dates, we wanted it to be chronological, but you can't fiddle around with years like 1874 and whatnot. please look at the dates in green instead.
current mood:  heto na!
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| Thursday, December 30th, 2004
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December 30th 2004|6.23pm - 06-19-1861
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Hello world! :)
Andito na ako!
current mood:  energetic
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| Wednesday, December 29th, 2004
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December 29th 2004|9.37pm - 08-20-1864
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Memorize ko na ang alphabet! Ang galing galing ko talaga noh? Imagine, 3 years old palang ako! Tinuruan kasi ako ni Nanay, at ang galing din niyang magturo. Gusto ko pang matuto ng iba! More more more!
Pepe
current mood:  nerdy
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December 29th 2004|10.10am - 11-14-1868
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Mayroon nanaman akong bagong private tutor..
drumroll please!
si Maestro Leon Monroy! Siya'y kaklase ni itay dati, at napakagaling niyang magsalita ng espanol at ng latin! isang linggo pa lamang niya akong tinuturuan, at marunong na ako. eto..
Pepe es muy guwapo.
o diba? hehe :)
O sige, ipinapatawag na ako sa baba.
Pepe
current mood: nerdy
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December 29th 2004|9.31am - 04-29-1869
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Nakakalungkot na balita.
si Maestro ay kinuha na raw ng Panginoon..ayaw sabihin nila inay at itay kung ano ang nangyari.
Minsan naririnig ko sila na pinaguusapang ipapadala daw ako sa Binan para mag-aral. Ayoko nga!
Pepe
current mood:  angry
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| Tuesday, December 28th, 2004
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December 28th 2004|9.44pm - 06-06-1869
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Nakakainis naman, kakadating palang namin dito sa Binan at agad na ako pinasok sa iskwelahan ni nanay. Nakapag-ikot ikot ako sandali kasama si pinsan Leando...pero sandali lang talaga. Gusto ko pa naman sana umikot-ikot dito sa bago naming probinsiya..parang marami pa akong pwedeng mapuntahan.
Pero..siguro nga mas mubuti na mag-aral na ako. Walong taong gulang na ako, at sabi sa akin ni nanay malaki na ako, dapat na saakin ang mag-aral ng mabuti. Sayang daw at madami pa ako magagawa sa aking katalinuhan. Ahem. hehe.
Ngunit...
isang araw palang, at namimiss ko na ang Calamba. Doon, si nanay lang ang nagtuturo saakin ng mga kaalaman sa buhay. Pero dito, kailangan ko pa pumasok sa iskwelahan.
Pepe
current mood:  nostalgic
current music: Coffee and TV- Blur
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December 28th 2004|8.54pm - 06-07-1869
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1st day of school--1st day high--nakipagsapakan ako!
Kanina ay idinala ako ni kuya sa eskwelahan dito, sa pamumuno ng isang nagngangalang Maestro Justiniano Aquino Cruz.
Paano ako napaaway?
Paano ba naman kasi, si Pedro, pinagtatawanan ako habang kinakausap ko ang guro namin. Sa bandang katapusan ng araw, napuno na ako at hinamon ko siya sa sapakan. Buti nalang tinuruan ako ni Tio Manuel mag wrestling kaya natalo ko si Pedro. Tuwang-tuwa ako na nakaganti ako sa mayabang na kaklase kong iyon. Kala lang niya!
Noong tapos na ang klase, naglakad nanaman kami pauwi ni kuya Paciano. Nagulat ako at kilala rin pala niya ang guro namin. Naging istudyante na rin pala siya noong edad niya ako. Ganoon kaya ba talaga kapayat iyon noong guro siya ni kuya? Baka dati mataba siya at pumayat lang dahil sa init ng panahon. Pero gusto ko naman siya. Mabait siya saakin.
Kwinento ko rin pala kay kuya ang nangyari saamin ni Pedro kanina. Noong una pinagsabihan niya ako na huwag maging palaaway. Baka daw pag laki ko maging pinuno ako ng rebolusyong puro dugo lamang ang epekto. Pero malipas ang ilang minuto ng kanyang pagsesermon, bumigay rin siya at ngumiti habang ginugulo ang buhok ko. Siguro ay naintindihan rin niya kung ano yung pinagdaanan ko.
Pepe
current mood:  crazy
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December 28th 2004|5.46pm - 09-05-1869
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Kanina nabuo ko ang una kong tula. Pinamagatan ko itong ”Sa Aking Mga Kababata.” Tunkol ito sa pagmamahal ng iyong sariling wika. Inisip kong gawan ng tula ang paksang ito dahil parati ko naririnig sa bahay na importanteng malaman ng isang tao ang tunay na kagandahan ng sariling niyang wika. Kaya inisip kong magsulat para matuwa ang pamilya ko saakin at makatulong ako sa pagintindi ng mga tao sa paksang ito.
Matagal ko nang nais makabuo ng sarili kong tula dahil kahanga-hanga ang mga nababasa ko sa iskuwelahan. At kanina, sa wakas nakabuo na ako ng tula na matatawag kong akin talaga. Tuwang-tuwa ako noong natapos ko ito at agad ko ito pinakita sa aking pamilya. Kahanga-hanga raw ang aking nabuo at dapat daw mapagpatuloy ko ang kakayahan kong magsulat at tumula.
Iba talaga ang pakiramdam kapag nakababad ako sa literatura. Hindi ko mailagay sa tamang mga salita, ngunit tiyak isang araw matatanto ko ito at siguradong ilalagay ko ito sa isang mahiwatig na tula.
Pepe
current mood:  contemplative
current music: Spin Spin Sugar - Sneaker Pimps
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December 28th 2004|3.47pm - 03-20-1870
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Kakauwi pa lamang namin galing eskuwelahan. Huling araw na ng aming klase kanina.
Boo.
Bakasiyon na kami ngayon hanggang hunyo daw sabi ni nanay. Ganito pala sa iskuwelahan, may ilang buwan pa kami para magpahinga bago magsimula ang bagong semestre.
Masayang-masaya ako sa mga award na nakuha ko kanina. Ako daw ang pinakamagaling sa Spanish at Latin.(hehe!) Sa Matematika rin ako ang pinakamagaling ngunit hindi ko pa nakukuha ang parangal nila saakin para dito. Tuwang-twa sila kuya sa aking mga nakamit sa unang taon ko sa iskuwelahan. Sana mapatuloy ko itong mabuting kalagayan ko kasi masarap ang karamdaman na makita sila na ngumingiti dahil sa akin.
Bagamat madaming naiinggit saakin, hahayaan ko na lamang sila. Ito ang payo saakin ni nanay. Minsan nga ay sinisiraan nila ako sa guro kaya napaparusahan ako at napapagalitan. Pero sabi ni nanaya huwag daw ako gumanti dahil magiging katulad ko lamang sila kapag ginawa ko iyon. Kaya ang ginagawa ko na lamang, gumuguhit ako ng mga larawan kung saan mukha silang loko. Doon na lamang ako gumaganti para sa paraang iyon walang gulo.
Kapag pinapakita ko nga ang mga ginuguhit ko kay kuya natutuwa siya dahil magaling daw pala ako gumuhit. Gusto ko yung pakiramdam kapag gumuguhit ako. Tila lahat kaya ko gawin kasi ako ang may hawak ng lapis at ako lang ang may kontrol kung ano ang pwede iguhit. Hindi ako titigil sa pagguguhit. Hanggang matanda na ako, ito parin ang magiging hilig ko.
Sige hanggang dito na muna.
Pepe
current mood:  accomplished
current music: Shoulder Holster - Morcheeba
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| Monday, December 27th, 2004
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December 27th 2004|10.33pm - 05-25-1870
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May nahanap ako quiz! Eto, sagutan niyo naman...at sasagot din ako para sa inyo :P
1. Your Middle Name:
2. Age:
3. Single or Taken:
4. Favorite Movie:
5. Favorite Song:
6. Favorite Band/Artist:
7. Dirty or Clean:
8. Tattoos and/or Piercings:
HERE COMES THE FUN ... ... ...
1. Do we know each other outside of Live Journal?
2. Whats your philosophy on life?
3. Would you have my back in a fight?
4. Would you keep a secret from me if you thought it was in my best interest?
5. What is your favorite memory of us?
6. Would you give me a kidney?
7. Tell me one odd/interesting fact about you:
8. Would you take care of me when I'm sick?
9. Can we get together and make a cake?
10. Have you heard any rumors of me lately?
11. Do you/have you talk(ed) crap about me?
12. Do you think I'm a good person?
13. Would you drive across country with me?
14. Do you think I'm attractive?
15. If you could change anything about me, would you?
16. Would you come over for no reason just to hang out?
17. Will you post this so I can fill it out for you?
current mood:  curious
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December 27th 2004|9.13pm - 02-26-1874
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Puberty, with all its mishaps and debacles and debauchery, has been ordained by God to be Man's punishment since the expulsion of our forefathers from Eden. If women have their moon cycles and their suffering whilst giving birth, then men (boys, in any case) have been smote with puberty.
Sweaty palms and pitches in voice, a veritable eruption of pustules around the forehead, hair in strange places; all this is a very new, very strange experience. Being a little older myself, I do not have the badges of puberty that the younger students here wear so conspicuously on their noses and foreheads. Rather, I have somehow become vulnerable instead to that which
makes puberty all the more unbearable: women.
K. has been exceptionally engaging, in the last week. There is something about her virginality that stirs in me a proud feeling that I know her and that I have been blessed to know such a creature as she. If the Virgin Mary were alive today, would that I were imprisoned in a dark cell away from the public, for I dare not mistake the one for the other.
Whenever K. smiles, I feel as if I had just eaten a whole leg of crispy pata. Everything is right with the world when one has crispy pata in one's belly and a smile on one's lips. She gives that self-same satisfaction, without the grease.
Of her purity, I dare not speak, for it is as if once I try to reduce it to something describable with my words, no matter how articulate I might be, I would diminish from it. And, upon diminishing it, it slips from my grasp like the wisps of her hair that catch in her mouth when the wind is coming from the sea. When one writes of God, one reinforces Him and one's belief; it is a two-fold manifestation of His power. His power, however, has left me in awe of the utter purity that exists in this one person, in this one woman, in this one vestibule of light. Verona's lovers now do not seem so contrived.
Let me tell you my story:
My sisters and beloved Leonor study at the Colegio de la Concordia, alongside this vision. They live intimately with each other like they were all sisters from the same mother. As I had an hour or so to spare before Latin (and seeing that the professor wasn't the sharpest tack in the toolbox), I decided to take a leisurely afternoon stroll over to the Colegio and pay my respects. I had reached the great wooden doors to where the lovely nymphs romped gaily (daily), and I was about to enter those halls when I decided it was a perfect day for a flower in my lapel. Picking up a bloom from a nearby yellow-bell plant and placing it smartly in my button hole, I quickened my step and swung my umbrella as if I had no cares on that bright and yellow-tinged day.
Announcing my arrival to the attendant at the front desk of the dormitory, I was requested to wait outside the doors, as it is not customary for men such as I to stand in the presence of so many ladies and retain my composure, or so said that attendant whose wandering eyes and harelip made her seem more a threat to the virtue of her charges than my own dapper looks and charm. Agreeing to indulge this beast, I walked back outside, hearing the wooden heels of my shoes echo with each of my steps on the marble floor of the dormitory lobby.
The sun, which was kinder before I had stepped in and talked to the Gorgon, was now aiming its rays precisely at my eyes and I had to bear the pain, for while it is a blinding experience, staring into the sun, it is also a beautiful sight to behold. Suddenly, my vision was blocked by a small figure with large eyes and neat hair.
"Pleased to make your acquaintance, I am Pepe. I am the brother of your two school-mates, Trini and Maria. I have just announced my presence to your keeper." Said I, bowing a little and shifting my umbrella from one arm to the other, as it had suddenly grown uncomfortable.
A girl looked at me and said, "If you would, sir, you are blocking the entrance. I shall tell Trini and Maria that you are here. Please excuse me." And then she walked past me, drawing her clothes nearer to her although Apollo had not yet made his journey fully across the sky.
Berating myself for being a fool and an idiot for standing in front of a doorway and staring at the sun, I shuffled off to the side, nervously switching my umbrella from one crook of one arm to the other one, unable to find a proper place for it.
After some time had elapsed, my beautiful sisters came through the doors and greeted me affectionately. I had not seen them in almost three days, and I had missed them dearly. They brought with them a girl by the name Segunda Katigbak whose face was obscured by her fan. I thought perhaps she had blackened teeth and did not want to embarass herself when I made her smile.
Curtseying as I bowed my acknowlegment of her, she dropped her fan in the customary French way, and I saw that behind her fan was none other than the person who had requested that I move out of her way!
An awkward silence occured for a short time, as I knew not how to address her, having so rudely inconvenienced her 'ere our formal meeting. Gracefully she ended the silence by asking me about the flower I had so jauntily arranged in my buttonhole. Sensing perhaps a chance for a romantic overture on my part, my sisters then politely excused themselves to admire the yellow-bell plant from whence I had plucked my own little badge.
"Tienes una novia?"
"No, no tengo. I have never dreamed of having one, because I know full well that nobody would pay attention to me, especially the pretty ones."
"Porque? You are lying to yourself. Would you like me to find you one?"
"Thank you Señorita, but I do not want to bother you."
And thus the moment ended. My sisters returned from their sojourn to the yellow-bell tree, and I walked with them upon my arms until the ribbon vendor a short ways up the street. Purchasing three ribbons for my companions, I escorted them back to the dormitory and went on my way, after spending a tranquil hour with the dearest ones in my world. Now I know of Carroll's emotion when he wrote, "In the Golden Afternoon, full leisurely we glide".
On K.
She is not the most beautiful woman I have ever seen, but I have not met another more alluring and more beguiling. From time to time that she looked at me on our walk, I blushed. As they say in the vernacular of these times, "rawr."
I hear that she is engaged, but time shall tell. I want to pursue her, for every great hunter must bring down his first regal doe without spilling a drop of blood. A Herculean task, methinks, but there is none more suited towards its achievement than I.
Hay.
Pepe
current mood:  apathetic
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| Sunday, December 26th, 2004
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December 26th 2004|9.31pm - 07-02-1876
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Napakasaya ko ngayong araw!!
Bakit? Nakatanggap ako ng bagong tsinelas, at hindi ko na kinakailangang bumili pa. Yipee! Ipinadalhan ako ng aking mga mababait na kapatid, para sa aking kaarawan noong Hunyo 19. Akala ko pa nama'y nakalimutan na nila ako. Nagdadrama pa ako nun. Ngunit hindi pala! May pangalan ko pa ang aking bagong tsinelas...astig! Wala nang tatangkang magnakaw nito o humiram pa man din. Hehe. Mang-iinggit nga ako bukas ng mga kaklase. :D
Pepe
current mood: excited
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| Saturday, December 25th, 2004
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December 25th 2004|2.36am - 07-03-1876
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Sinuot ko ang tsinelas ko kanina! hehe!
Pepe
current mood:  rushed
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| Friday, December 24th, 2004
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December 24th 2004|4.27pm - 10-24-1877
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Grades
I got my grades today.
Sobrasaliente, like nine other students in class. What is the point of being the best, when there are nine other people who are just as much of "the best" that you are? What, therefore, is the logic behind grades in the first place? Should we not instead by assigned numbers, in descending order, to really know the demarcation between ourselves and our classmates?And if I was not awarded the number uno I would kill whoever was.
There is very little to talk about with regards to school. I'm bullied by the Spaniards in class for being small and thin, and I'm bullied by the teachers for knowing too much. It's not my place to know so much, I'm just an indio etc etc etc. I haven't got much patience for these pompous stuffed shirts here at Ateneo Municipal. The only positive thing about going to this school is the carved ceilings.
I had to change my name to Rizal, because of Paciano's association with Burgos. Why does it suddenly become my fault that I'm an Alonzo y Mercado? What kind of name is Rizal anyway? Hay. Not only am I picked on, but I had to change my name, and I'm not even the best at what I do.
I lead an unfulfilling life. Would that I were like the patriotic Filipinos who have lunch under the trees in the quad. I tried to join them for a spirited conversation one afternoon, but that effort was thwarted when this fell on me. Even nature has conspired against me!
Besides, the Filipinos there that day have, on more than one occasion, have left unpleasant "gifts" in my shoes after gym class. I think that the worm that fell on me was instead saving my principles, while sacrificing my skin. As I write this, I cannot help but scratch at my newfound freedom from conformity!
...I'm just fooling myself. I got attacked by caterpillar itch, and my trying to euphemize it makes it itch even more. Confound that infernal tree! Before this year is over, I vow to carve a bust of my choosing from the wood of that tree, and I shall enjoy cutting it down.
Itchy and unsatisfied,
Pepe
current mood:  bitchy
current music: Bohemian Rhapsody - Queen
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| Thursday, December 23rd, 2004
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December 23rd 2004|5.59pm - 07-01-1880
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( look what I found. )
Natutuwa talaga ako sa mga usapan tungkol sa relihiyon..wala lang. and I don't understand why some people relegate it to the periphery when one is pressed for dinner conversation.
Naisipan kong gumawa ng istorya tungkol sa relhiyon nung isang araw...tapos malamang ay tatapusin ko iyon pagtanda ko. pero sa ngayon, siguro ay gagawa muna ako ng outline.
( The Lord Gazes on the Philippine Islands )
current mood: annoyed
current music: Safe from Harm - Massive Attack
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| Monday, January 5th, 2004
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January 5th 2004|12.45pm - 12-29-1881
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December 29, 1881
Hay nako! Mga babae talaga.
Kahapon ay nakatanggap ako ng sulat mula sa minamahal kong Taimis. Nagagalit siya at nagtatampo, sapagkat hindi ko daw siya sinusulatan, at wala daw akong rason para dito. Wala naman daw akong mga magulang na naninirahang kasama ko katulad niya, kung kaya't nahihirapan siya gumawa ng mga sulat.
Hindi ba niya naiintindihang napakadami kong ginagawa?? Ang hirap maglaan ng oras para magsulat sa kanya. Sa lahat nalang ng bagay, siya'y nagtatampo. Pasko at magbabagong taon na nga, ganyan pa rin siya.
...
Ngunit..
Oo, sige, tama siya. Pero ako ba'y masisisi? Sa gulang kong ito, aywan ko na.
Hindi ko na alam.
Nagugulumihanan ako.
Mahal ko pa ba ang aking Taimis, si Leonor Rivera?
Ngayon ay hindi ko na talaga alam.
Hayy. Mga babae talaga. Buti pa ang mga lalake.
Pepe
current mood:  confused
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| Friday, January 2nd, 2004
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January 2nd 2004|2.43am - 05-05-1882
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Arrival at Singapore
(nakikigamit lang ako ng computer, para mag blog)
Kakarating ko pa lamang sa Singapore...at home-sick na ako! Kakaiba itong nararamdaman ko; I never realized I was actually travelling to Spain and leaving my family behind.
Sumakay ako sa Salvadora mga anim na araw nang nakalipas. Si Uncle Antonio ay kinuhaan ako ng passport, na Jose Mercado. Ang galing! Uncle Antonio, Vicenta Gella, at Mateo Evangelista ang naghatid sa akin sa Salvadora (Thanks!!).
Sa pangalawang araw ng paglalakbay, na-seasick ako. Ang pangit ng pakiramdam. Di pa kasi siguro ako sanay sa pagsakay ng barko. O siguro...hindi ko alam...ewan ko.
Gusto ko na lamang makita ang mga magagandang lugar dito sa Singapore..mas makakapagrelax ako nun. Sana.
Pepe
current mood: contemplative
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| Thursday, January 1st, 2004
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January 1st 2004|2.45am - 05-15-1882
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I had another bad dream.
I dreamed I returned to Calamba. I return home to meet my parents but they do not want to speak with me. They have the right to be upset with me, seeing as I did not consulted them about my first trip abroad to Spain. I then returned traveling abroad with one hundred pesos I again borrowed. It broke my heart.
I woke up and found myself inside my cabin. yet it all seemed all too real.
Bangungot lamang..
Pepe
current mood:  depressed
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January 1st 2004|1.07am - Education Gives Luster to Motherland
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Wise education, vital breath
Inspires an enchanting virtue;
She puts the Country in the lofty seat
Of endless glory, of dazzling glow,
And just as the gentle aura's puff
Do brighten the perfumed flower's hue:
So education with a wise, guiding hand,
A benefactress, exalts the human band.
Man's placid repose and earthly life
To education he dedicates
Because of her, art and science are born
Man; and as from the high mount above
The pure rivulet flows, undulates,
So education beyond measure
Gives the Country tranquility secure.
Where wise education raises a throne
Sprightly youth are invigorated,
Who with firm stand error they subdue
And with noble ideas are exalted;
It breaks immortality's neck,
Contemptible crime before it is halted:
It humbles barbarous nations
And it makes of savages champions.
And like the spring that nourishes
The plants, the bushes of the meads,
She goes on spilling her placid wealth,
And with kind eagerness she constantly feeds,
The river banks through which she slips,
And to beautiful nature all she concedes,
So whoever procures education wise
Until the height of honor may rise.
From her lips the waters crystalline
Gush forth without end, of divine virtue,
And prudent doctrines of her faith
The forces weak of evil subdue,
That break apart like the whitish waves
That lash upon the motionless shoreline:
And to climb the heavenly ways the people
Do learn with her noble example.
In the wretched human beings' breast
The living flame of good she lights
The hands of criminal fierce she ties,
And fill the faithful hearts with delights,
Which seeks her secrets beneficent
And in the love for the good her breast she incites,
And it's th' education noble and pure
Of human life the balsam sure.
And like a rock that rises with pride
In the middle of the turbulent waves
When hurricane and fierce Notus roar
She disregards their fury and raves,
That weary of the horror great
So frightened calmly off they stave;
Such is one by wise education steered
He holds the Country's reins unconquered.
His achievements on sapphires are engraved;
The Country pays him a thousand honors;
For in the noble breasts of her sons
Virtue transplanted luxuriant flow'rs;
And in the love of good e'er disposed
Will see the lords and governors
The noble people with loyal venture
Christian education always procure.
And like the golden sun of the morn
Whose rays resplendent shedding gold,
And like fair aurora of gold and red
She overspreads her colors bold;
Such true education proudly gives
The pleasure of virtue to young and old
And she enlightens out Motherland dear
As she offers endless glow and luster.
current mood: nerdy
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